i will just repeat my comment i send you per note officially once again a brilliant poem - and thank you finding my title acceptable. it gave me a lot of strong images to work on, so it was no big problem for me. but what about some longer texts? maybe a novel? is there something in work? your writing skills can handle such a big project i believe

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when a vampire falls in love ... can you stake his heart?

Oh my.
You are far too kind.
I do have 15 Chapters of one story up, and i'm working on another two at the same time.
One is a Ghost/Horror kind of story, perhaps you would enjoy it?
Anyways, thankyou again for another compliment.

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One is all for religion until one visits a really religious country. Then, one is all for drains, machinery and a minimum wage. - Aldous Huxley

i am a writer - of course i enjoy every story told well. just send me something - i would love to read.

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when a vampire falls in love ... can you stake his heart?

As soon as I submit the first Chapter of my Horror/Thriller/Ghost story thing i'll let you know.
For now though I will link you to the first Chapter of the story I already have on here.
Perhaps you would consider watching me? I have a few more pieces in mind.

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One is all for religion until one visits a really religious country. Then, one is all for drains, machinery and a minimum wage. - Aldous Huxley

This is very good. May I suggest a couple of things to tweak to make it stronger? The main changes are in the way of punctuation, grammar, and format because your word choice are excellent.

Your first three sentences are fragments, which is just fine. But you put a comma after the first one, and periods after the next two. I think it should be one or the other for the sake of emphasis.

Also, I suggest writing the following sentence this way: "so you must be a heartbreaker, Sweetheart" (stress on the comma and the capital letter) because it sounds more conversational and carries with it a greater impact (like you're talking to someone in particular). The same goes for the line, "Oh Baby, you're a killer".

Also, your last line I think should be separated from the stanza so that it stands alone. It's almost like starting a new thought and then leaving the reader hanging, so you should put an extra space in between those two lines like so:

"Well that's not very lady like at all.

Is that a halo in your hand?"

Hope you find this helpful. I really do like this and I think it would be perfect with just a few tweaks. Good job!

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Punknera is no more! I am now *ATrue.

Hmmm...
I was initially going to say that I wrote this in the way that I say things, however your "tweaks" do make a lot of sense.
I shall include your helpful hints.

Yay for critique!

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One is all for religion until one visits a really religious country. Then, one is all for drains, machinery and a minimum wage. - Aldous Huxley

This is a fairly mediocre poem, but the images are passable.

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It ought to be illegal for an artist to marry. If the artist must marry let him find someone more interested in art, or his art, or the artist part of him, than in him. After which let them take tea together three times a week.

Lovely, I like it .

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<sub>"Some people are like slinkies; only amusing when you push them down the stairs."

Thanks for the avatar, ~Espeon202! <3.</sub>

i really like the poem. and the picture is really grand.

loverly <3

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Even Fairytale Characters would be jealous <3